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Wild Bill for America

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"America, bless God."
—A saying Bill spews constantly.
WildBill-0
WildBillPic

Wild Bill (Wild Bill is in fact his stripper name, his given name is William Finlay), also known as Mild Bill, Mild Phil, and Mild Shill for America. is a conservative, all-American, ten gallon hat-wearing genius, a spokesperson for the Tea Party, and an active Bing user. He is a Christian and "Liberalologist" who uses excellent arguments to destroy Liberalism.

The Drunken Peasants have watched many of his videos but TJ first made a video about Wild Bill in June 2013 on his Amazing Atheist channel.

Wild Bill's nemesis is Baraq Obama. He was almost killed by his army of Kenyanists when trying to defeat him and save 'Murica. Fuck yeah.

Bill Claims to be an ex police man when in reality he was a Drag Queen from 1974 to 1980 then made his money as a Mall cop and Door to Door Ron Jeremy Merkin Salesman, He ran and failed to run for office in Florida twice in the 80's in his pre mustachio days. He spent most of the 90's in cover bands playing jazz flute or as a cowboy backing dancer in the village people, in 2001 he worked as a mall cop at Sea World till he was fired for inappropriate behaviour with penguins.

Mild Phil for America

Wild Bill has a nephew named Mild Phil who has a message for the Drunken Peasants.

A Message to The Drunken Peasants02:25

A Message to The Drunken Peasants

Tony's Liberal Cat

The cat, like Ben, hides its identity.

Tony's Liberal Cat

Tony's Liberal Cat (not to be confused with god's chosen cat CC) is a cat that briefly appears throughout Wild Bill's video entitled "Tony's Liberal Cat" (And possibly others). The Cat™ is a Democrat according to Bill, as The Cat™ knocked Mild Bill's 'Impeach Obama' mug off the table and broke it. As a staunch anti-progressive republican and tea-partier, it comes to no surprise that Bill would hate this stupid liberal cat. And rightfully so. I bet he voted for Nobama.

List of DP appearances

Great War of Terrorism

This was a war fought between good and evil. Wild Bill and Jesus were going to single-handedly kill every terrorist in the world, BUT "Mild Phil" betrayed Lord Jeebus and started working for Obama in a trade for a PS4 and a copy of COD:Jihadi Warfare, so it's a stalemate right now.

Quotes

  • "Soon lynching will come back, and this time it won't be black people." - Will Bill reveals that Eskimos will soon be lynched at the behest of TJ.
  • "We are beginning to see signs of dictator-like behavior in the president of the United States. Not surprising that his closest advisers tend to admire Castro, Che Guevara, Mao Tse Tung, Marx and others." [1]
  • "How many of you remember when schools were crime free? I do. It was back when we were one nation under God, when every school kid grew up with a Pledge of Allegiance and the Ten Commandments. Respect for God was infused in our national identity and the schools were crime free." [2]
  • "We may need to walk like an Egyptian to restore rule of law."
  • "I need a man with slow hand, I need A Lover With an Easy Touch"
  • "I Pledge a Merkin To Every Patriotic American As Senator For Florida" Quote From Bill or Marmaduke as he was Known in 1984 when he ran for office.
  • "Buy My Nude Calendar at Titanmen.com"
  • "Ronald Regan was MyReal Daddy"

Trivia

  • Wild Bill is going to hell for putting America before God.
  • Wild Bill, in his elder years, has had a depreciation of testosterone levels, causing him to wear faggy shirts much like other conservative demigogues such as Glanderson Booper. What a commie.
  • He probably likes Johnny Rebel.
  • He has sought to distance himself from his former career as a male striper, yet retains his old stage name.
  • Interestingly, G Man is actually subscribed to Wild Bill on YouTube.
  • Sargon of Akkad is subscribed to Wild Bill, as he finds his videos hilarious.
  • The first result on Google relating to Wild Bill is "Wild Bill for America Racist".
  • Wild Bill claims to be a former police officer, although there is little evidence to support this claim. Wouldn't be all that difficult for him to prove it either. Hmmm....
  • Mild Jill has current ownership of his dying neighbor's liberal cat. He makes his terminally ill neighbor sleep in the car while he jerks off the cat.
  • While not confirmed, it is highly suspected that Wild Bill is a homosexual who frequently consensually rapes TJ. In fact, TJ's sore anus can frequently be seen in the background of Wild Bill's videos.
  • Wild Bill claims that the second Holocaust is fast approaching due to the amount of Christian percution in the United States at the hands of militant homosexuals.
  • Ben and TJ once tried to gangbang Tony's Liberal Cat™, but were caught by PETA. They later succeeded at the annual Ohio Furry Convention that Wild Bill was also attending. The 4 then became friends for life.
  • Bill often likes to say ''America bless God'' which shows his dyslexia as well as secret atheism.
  • TJ has mentioned having a desire to beat Bill to death with a brick, it's pretty easy to see why.
  • Bill considers atheists mentally-challenged monkeys, which is rather ironic.
  • His hat needs to be that big in order to store his gigantic brain.
  • Has stated in episode 134 that Egypt has issued an arrest warrant against Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.
  • If Bill wakes up every morning at 9:11 a.m.
  • If he stubs his toe on a chair, he blames the liberal chair. If he gets a piece of bone in his cheeseburger that chips his tooth, he blames the liberal dentists and liberal chef. If it starts to rain while he's out in the park, he blames the liberal precipitation. Then if he gets explosive diarrhea from the food he just ate, he'll blame the liberal E. coli.
  • In episode 170, he shilled an 80 page calendar, which is strange since there are only 12 months in a year. 80/12=6.66, therefore Wild Bill is satanic.
  • Speaking on that, Wild Bill's Calender makes people (and frogs) gay
  • Wild Bill thinks the Federal Courts are more of a threat to Murycar than dem ISIS liberal Nazi Jews
  • Wild Bill thinks that lesbians are castrating little boys like "Tommy" and turning them into little pussified feminine faggots.
  • He claims to have friends with the "Secret Service" and, surprise surprise, he told ALL of the "secrets", which he is not supposed to do.
  • Wild Bill is a fucking lazy cunt. Instead of "fixing" these so called "problems" that he thinks the left created, he expects his retarded fanbase to give him $3,000 to build a church, although $3,000 could only give him a useless shed for his stupid backyard.
  • When stating that 41% of Transgendered people commit suicide to make his point, he doesn't realise that people like him are the reason they commit suicide.
  • His birth was worse than The Holocaust.
  • He's the inbred xenophobe Steve Shives thinks absolutely everyone who criticizes Islam is.
  • Bill stands uncomfortably in all his videos this is due to the Ronald Reagan shaped lucky Butt Plug he holds in his Prolapsing Anus for Good Luck
  • Bill is in fact a Arminian Lap Dancer who had a eternal love of Walker Texas Ranger
  • Bill always votes Democrat as agression is his fuel
  • Bill has names tattooed on all 3 of his nipples left is Barbra middle is Huskey and right is Curtis
  • Bill drives Tata Nano
  • Bill Made His Money in Ron Jeremy Merkins
  • Under Bills Hat is a Vote Bernie Beanie and Under that on of His fox hair Merkins
  • Bill Ran for office in 1986 his moniker was "Making A Merkin for America Again" which caused much confusion
  • Bill only wears Indian silk underwear to protect his delicate butthole from being hurt.
  • Bill once ate a dead body (of a cow).
  • Bill Played Jazz Flute in a Jefro Tull Cover Band call Aqua Kilt
  • Bill Was an extra in many VCA porn movies made in 1995
  • Bills real name is Marmaduke Ruth Hussy, He adopted the Name Wild Bill after his Hero Cowboy Bill Watts
  • Bill's ideology changes with his hat.

Gallery

External Links

References

  1. https://archive.is/P0Dkg
  2. https://archive.is/QAjZS

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