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Sara Avery

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Sara Avery, also known as McFinnegan Oralia Vaginaria Saralicious "I sure love them donuts" Dickukkake von der Clit is a morbidly obese Jesuit behemoth fuck from some country. Avery's failure as a writer has caused her weight to rise daily. She currently weighs 2000 lbs and is kept chained up inside a barn next to an underground slaughterhouse, where she is fed a mixture of chocolate cake and cottage cheese. She was raised by whales, and kidnapped by The Jesuits.

Prisoners are thrown into the barn with Sara Avery to be raped. Many victims die from the infection spread by her massive folds. Others are lost in the folds of her vagina never to be seen or heard from again.

Recently, Gail's Men captured her, and attempted to force her to lose weight. This is a dangerous task, due to her unpredictable nature, as once a woman is over 200 pounds, they are officially an animal.

On November 27th, 2015, Sara Avery escaped her captivity from Gail's men, and went on a rampage through San Francisco, during which she brutally cannibalized a ginger kid (who happened to be Bubba's boyfriend) in San Francisco. She mistook the ginger kid for gingerbread, which resulted in cannibalism.

Currently, she has been spotted walking over the Atlantic Ocean, presumably trying to reach Europe.

Saraavery

Her presumed body.

How Fat is Sara Avery?

Sara Avery is so fat:

  • Scientists classify her as a gas giant
  • When she walks down the beach the tide rolls in
  • Finding her vagina would require surgery
  • Her farts set off every car alarm in the city
  • Not even black men will have sex with her
  • Her neighbors called animal control, and the officers took her to Sea World
  • Retards can't stop asking why she has extra butts where her vagina should be
  • Each crease of her folds has its own ecosystem
  • Whales beach themselves trying to have sex with her
  • When she goes to Mexico, all the Hispanic women think they've lost weight
  • Freak shows turn her away for being over-qualified
  • Each of her buttcheeks has its own zip code
  • When she gives guys head they yell, "THURR SHE BLOWS!"
  • Midgets stand underneath her for shade
  • Her lesbian sister can't find her vagina, so she just licks every fold to make sure she's satisfied
  • Captain Ahab keeps calling, asking for his leg back
  • She went to the zoo and an elephant tried to have sex with her. The elephant's penis was too small for such a large and loose vagina
  • When she flies, they charge her for every seat on the plane
  • She pees gravy
  • She sweats butter
  • Every time she steps foot out of the house she is arrested for indecent exposure
  • Her dad only had sex with her because he felt bad
  • Weight Watchers can't stop watching her
  • She was pulled over and arrested for carrying 10 pounds of crack
  • Walruses try and compete with her for mates
  • Wringing out her folds would end the drought in California
  • She traps stray cats under her folds
  • On hot days she begins to melt and greases the sidewalks
  • Chubby-chasers become so ashamed they can only date anorexic chicks after looking at her
  • The UN blames her for world hunger
  • Guinness rejected her application to be the fattest woman alive because she's too fat to be considered a person
  • She has to use volcanoes as a toilet
  • She thinks of skinny girls like Rule 13 as "bite sized"
  • She never has to walk uphill because they always flatten
  • If she ever lost weight she would just look like a big droopy vagina
  • When she wears a red T-shirt small black children follow her around trying to hit her up for Kool-Aid
  • Her body is considered a bio-chemical weapon
  • She's fatter than Brett Keane and Dorn combined.

Trivia

  • Sara has the ability to eat anything including an entire city.
  • Sara is 2000 lbs as said earlier in the article.
  • If she grows larger, which she will, her vagina will collapse into a black hole.
  • Cody Weber was sucked into her folds never to be seen again.
  • She takes selfies with Google Earth.
  • It is theorized that Bubba's boyfriend still lives within her.

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