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Laughing Witch

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Attention (2)
Warning!
WARNING: This page is responsible for Laughing Witch's business being in the shitter. Also this article is a textbook example of Cyber-Terrorism. BE AFRAID!
"Everybody has to be censored."
―Laughing Witch[src]

Jennifer Keller-Burns is a dried-up husk of aging flesh, carved out and filled with all the bitterness in the universe. She's known on the interwebs as a delusional, middle-aged fishwife and SJW vlogger who provides great entertainment by rambling incoherently on camera. Her online handle Laughing Witch is an accurate representation of her character because she is a wretched hag whose existence is an affront to nature, and her laughter is a result of her psychosis.

Laughing Witch periodically uploads YouTube videos (well, she used to) trying to expose the right-wing misogyny of Thunderf00t and Sargon of Akkad, opting for batshit conspiracy theory over anything resembling argumentation. This makes her on par with The Vigilant Christian, only without the views and subs. She is also the self-appointed leader of the online Social Justice Scumfucks which includes the likes of Jenny McDermott, Bewildered Ape, Kevin Logan and HannibalTheSexOffendingVictor, for the duration of one video.

In her life outside of the internet, she is the Vice-President and Office & Accounting Manager of Porcelain Tub Restorations with her husband Paul Burns - the owner - who've been in thousands of dollars of debt for months now. That's right, she's not just intellectually bankrupt. Her financial situation would naturally seem to be a top priority for Jennifer, but she preferred spending her time posting more sub-par videos, most of which no longer exist.

Vs. Thunderf00t

Background

Laughing Witch Laughing Witch Unplugged 1 (MIRROR)21:10

Laughing Witch Laughing Witch Unplugged 1 (MIRROR)

Jennifer Keller is of the feminist mantra that Thunderf00t is the primary cause of Anita Sarkeesian's online harassment because he has consistently made videos criticizing her content and what she has said. Because Keller does not possess the intelligence to simply refute the points in Thunderf00t's videos, she'd rather complain day-in and day-out about them even existing and is all for censoring his right to make videos about Anita. Keller herself was totally fine with Bewildered Ape's and Jenny McDermott's satire exploiting Thunderf00t's dying father.

The Campaign

Letter to thunderfoots employer

Some valid criticism

Jennifer Keller is most known for initiating the online campaign started in February of 2015 which involved writing letters to Thunderf00t's employers, the police and the local newspapers in hopes of defaming him by making flimsy and outright untrue accusations about his character. The letter-writing wasn't her original idea as she was actually inspired by her buddy Bewildered Ape who was the first person to do it as "performance art". Keller's letter in question, titled Dr Philip Mason leader of a hate group, claimed Thunderf00t was a Nazi who leads an army of white male supremacist skinheads that have openly harassed Anita Sarkeesian, and is racist against Muslims somehow. The desired effect was to make Thunderf00t's employer offer him an ultimatum; to stop making anti-Anita Sarkeesian videos as it may spoil the business' reputation, or to fuck right off. Basically, her desire was either censorship or ruining a man's livelihood because she disagreed with him.

At least 12 letters were sent and obviously had no effect on Thunderf00t's career because his employers aren't total retards who'll fire an employee because some mentally-unstable lowlife spent time out of her unfulfilled life to make scandalous accusations.

The UnYelpful Reviews

  • Oh, Jenny comes to the rescue!

Thunderf00t responded late October in a video which featured the footage of Laughing Witch proudly revealing her real name on her letter, as well as her company's website. He stated that if Keller does have the right to say what she wants about him to his employers, then others can say what they want about her on her business' page.

This resulted in a 100 or so people leaving 1 star reviews on the business' yelp page, half of the reviews including hilarious made-up stories about Keller and the other half simply describing what Keller has done. The company then went from 4 stars to 1 star. Keller herself has left 5 star reviews prior to the event, so her company may not be as peachy clean as she wants us to believe.

Keller responded by announcing that her company is currently "UNDER ATTACK BY A CONSERVATIVE HATE GROUP ON YOUTUBE" on her yelp page, and also closed her social media because of the backlash and the evidence of what she did being there for everyone to see. She claimed she did it out of love for her husband. Her poor, poor husband.

The Fundraiser

LaughingFinger

Laughing Witch to her 14 employees

To ease the situation, Keller apologized to Thunderf00t through her emissary Kevin Logan (you know, the guy who mocked Thunderf00t for getting emotional about his dying father) at the request that Thunderf00t take down his video. Thunderf00t refused to respond and Keller then restored her channel (so much for her love for her husband) and made her "final" YouTube video which consisted of a tacked-on non-apology with the very obvious purpose of saving face. She claimed in said video that she didn't want to get Thunderf00t fired, even though she made fun of him when he supposedly did. Funny how that works.

She also started a FundAnything campaign, titled Brigading Cyber Review Attack Defense Fund, to help her company back on its feet after the "cyber attack", trying guilt trip people into donating $25,000 using her 14 employees and pet dog. It was later discovered by AgentofDoubt that Keller was in debt way before the incident and faced a court-ordered judgment to the tune of $25,000. I'm sure it was all a coincidence. The fundraiser was then closed when they revealed they were already 100,000's of dollars in debt, and were filing for bankruptcy.

Fighting Back

Keller's situation was featured in WUSA9 which predictably omitted the part where she accused Thunderf00t of being a Nazi. It did in fact framed Keller as a YouTube Activist and her ordeal as a form of "Cyber-Terrorism".

Keller then made another video where she took back her attempt at an apology and used the recent events in her worthless life as justification for her "online protest". The only regret regarding her actions is that she should have called Thunderf00t a "fascist" instead of a Nazi, and a "bigot" instead of a racist. She now wants to get the FBI to track the IP addresses of all the people who left 1 star reviews. She essentially learnt fuck-all from her experience.

Sargon Livestream

My Stream with Laughing Witch, Jenny McDermott, Bewildered Ape, the SJW Gamer and Kevin Logan01:49:50

My Stream with Laughing Witch, Jenny McDermott, Bewildered Ape, the SJW Gamer and Kevin Logan

Laughing Witch explained her side of the story on Sargon's livestream channel alongside Horseface, Apeshit, Potato Head and some other SJW I haven't bothered to assign a childish nickname. Laughing Witch cackled like a crazy cunt as usual, but also wants to enact laws to censor certain viewpoints that she believes results in terrorism. Good Luck, you cancerous cat lady.

King Crocoduck

A YouTuber by the name of King Crocoduck stepped in and contacted Keller's husband, Paul Burns, and offered to support his 14 employees by creating individual PayPal accounts for each one which would receive donations through King Crocoduck's channel. King Crocoduck was very specific that - while he and Laughing Witch might not get along - he really didn't want to see innocent people suffer needlessly (Laughing Witch's employees). He explained that he needed three things to make it happen: (1) For each of their 14 employees to set up PayPal accounts that would be numbered, instead of named; and (2) for Paul Burns to send him a breakdown of the employee's wages, in terms of percentages. In this way, King Crocoduck would be able to appropriately cover the wages of the 14 employees, without ever having to know their names or personal information. King Crocoduck would oversee all money donated, and would deposit their wages as defined by Paul in their anonymous PayPal accounts, delivering a weekly report to Paul outlining all financial activity. Any overages would go to Paul, to help with business-related debt. King Crocoduck made it clear that he would only help in a scenario wherein the money would not go directly to Laughing Witch, feeling that donators would not be as willing to help if they thought money would be going directly into her hands, given the growing criticisms of her behavior around this time. Laughing Witch's husband, Paul, agreed with this sentiment.

The only catch to the plan would be that, to make people actually want to donate (King Crockoduck would be appealing to his own followers to donate, and posting the video on his own YouTube channel), Laughing Witch would have to "take the fall" so to speak; as both Paul and King Crock acknowledged, Laughing Witch was actively disliked in the YouTube community, so the likelihood of people donating money if they believed it would go directly to her would be minimal - especially considering that they would be asking her detractors to donate not for Laughing Witch, but for 14 innocent employees who might lose their jobs otherwise. So, King Crockoduck suggested cautiously that Paul make a video, detailing his struggling business, his recent injury in which he had broken his back, and in a loving, apologetic kind of way, claim that Laughing Witch was Vice President in the company in name only, but otherwise helped out in very limited capacities, only given the title to make her happy by her loving partner. The goal was to make Paul look like a loving, doting husband, and make Laughing Witch a secondary, background character in the "story", naïve in the ways of business and limited in the ways she could help. Paul would then proceed to discuss the recent tribulations of his 14 employees, mentioning their children, etc. - again without ever going into personal details or names. From there, King Crocoduck would explain how the money would be handled, so donators could be confident that their money was going directly to the employees in need.

At this point, Burns was overjoyed at the opportunity, repeatedly stating that nobody had ever done anything so nice for him before. King Crocoduck was apologetic about casting Laughing Witch, or "Jen", in such a light, but felt it was the best chance to raise the needed funds; Jen's husband agreed, and believed she would be on board also.

At the end of this Facebook chat, King Crocoduck explained the third and last condition/thing he would need to make this happen: (3) financial documents - in which all personal information would be redacted - showing that the company was in trouble, and had been in trouble for the past year (as Paul had indicated to King Crocoduck at the beginning of their chat). Thus, a business already in peril because of the economy and Paul's back injury would be shown to be pushed over the edge by the negative Yelp reviews. Paul was completely on board, groveling with thank you's and a touched heart, etc. He went offline to speak to his wife, Jen (Laughing Witch). The next morning, Jen herself emailed King Crocoduck thanking him, saying they'd be in touch soon.

Some time passed, and it became clear through several emails that for some unknown reason at the time, Paul was suddenly reluctant to share any financial information about his business.

Days later, Paul emailed King Crocoduck, suddenly with a cold tone, to tell him that Jen was not willing to "play into his (King Crocoduck's) MRA wet dreams", seemingly taking offense to the suggestion that she remain distanced from the situation for the sake of more donations. Paul instead told King Crocoduck that they'd started their own fundraising campaign, looking to raise $25,000, and would be pursuing that.

Ultimately however, it became clear that the reason they rejected King Crocoduck's help was because - as another YouTube user found, and as Thunderf00t includes in his response videos surrounding this topic - the couple had been sued by their bank several months earlier, and were required to pay almost exactly $25,000 in personal debt, unrelated to their business. This is why the couple was hesitant to provide any financial information as requested. In yet another characteristically evil move by Laughing Witch, however, she made sure to accuse King Crocoduck of having alterior motives, as if to better hide her own plan: taking advantage of kind-hearted internet strangers to pay a personal debt, under the guise of helping her "poor, poor employees".

(To read screengrabs of the Facebook chat & emails exchanged between Paul, Jen and King Crocoduck as outlined above, please see the November 6th post on the following reference blog, for YouTuber Noelplum99: noelplum99.blogspot.ca/).

Harassment Series

Laughing Witch's channel is currently devoted to a series of (as of now) 4 videos detailing her harassment as result of her actions. This involves negative messages, unsolicited letters sent to her (oh, how poetic), prank calls, and boxes of pizza sent to her business. I'm no talking about evil pizza that someone has taken a shit on or with death threats written on it in tomato sauce, but just normal pizza. That's a pretty awesome form of harassment. We'd love to get free pizza just for sending libelous letters to get someone fired. Lucky bitch.

On DP

Laughing Witch was featured in episode 172 in a Kevin Logan video that featured the news report (that being the only thing worth watching in his video). The peasants mostly disagreed with Thunderf00t's response, but admitted that she had it coming.

She was also mentioned by Jenny McDermott in episode 153 as someone who "exposes misogyny". The only thing she exposed was her real name. Jenny later mentioned her again in episode 169 when she used the attack against Keller's company as an excuse to appeal to major media sites in hopes of making her the next Anita Sarkeesian.

YouTube Content

"Hey, YouTube. This is Laughing Witch. I'm gonna do another video."
—No shit

Exit

She left YouTube after what happened with Thuderf00t, who aptly pointed out her cowardice and unwillingness to stand by her actions, or her words, and her attempts at "apologizing" just got her in more trouble. Cuntface Kevin and several other social justice retards used this as another example to prove how Thunderf00t is a misogynist, despite her being the cause of the drama. But regardless, the reaction to LaughingWitch's exit had this reaction from anyone with a brain:

♫ Ding dong the Witch has quit. Which old Witch? The LaughingWich. Ding dong, the LaughingWitch has quit♫,

Only idiots were sad to see her go. She was very unpleasant.

Trivia

Darthsionheadshot

Laughing Witch's final form, Darth Sion.

"CLEAN YOUR ROOM YOUNG MAN IT IS A PIG STY"
—The greatest argument she has ever made.
Laughingnaked

Without clothing

  • She made a video where she went on Sargon's private Facebook account in order to prove how racist and misogynistic he is because he posted a couple memes about Muslim women. Her name is "Laughing Witch", yet she cannot comprehend jokes.
  • She doesn't consider Thunderf00t's videos about Anita Sarkeesian as criticism, but considers her letter-writing campaign accusing him of being a Nazi as criticism.
  • Steve Shives promoted this harpy.
  • Laughing Witch filed privacy complaints against AgentofDoubt for revealing her existing debt. The debt is viewable for everyone here using the case number "050200190502015".
  • An account archiving all relative videos about the event.
  • She claims her father being an asshole made her tough. It's likely he also made her the shitbag she is today.
JennyMcDermottSaga The Jenny McDermott Saga
PT7K6Aekc
Waifus

Anita SarkeesianBewildered ApeBrett KeaneLaughing WitchKevin Logan

Sources of attention

Thunderf00tDrunken Peasants PodcastSargon of AkkadArmoured SkepticShoe0nHeadDick Coughlan

Episodes

474881DMCAGate 2015 (82 & 83) • 123146153164169

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