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Justin Bieber

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Justin Bieber or Dusty Beaver is a teen pop sensation and "singer" from Canada. He is best known for his song "Baby". TJ has made a plethora (fifteen, which can be found below) of videos about the shit that Justin and his fans do on his main channel.

One of his most popular videos is his first video about the rich Canadian cuck. Despite all the things TJ has said about him, he still admits that he'd like to trade lives with him because Justin's got large DOLLA!

Justin is a problematic, homophobic, racist, white, heterosexual, cisgender, Christian male who supports rape and cultural appropriation.

History

Justin Bieber was born on March 1, 1994 in Ontario, Canada to Pattie Mallette and Jeremy Bieber. In 2007, Justin starting singing on YouTube. In 2008, he was discovered by Scooter Braun and moved to America to start his career. In 2010, he released "Baby: and he became super popular.

In July 2015, he posted a picture of himself naked on a boat with his ass showing. It was highly underwhelming. 5/10.

In February 2016, it was reported on Zoolander 2 that Justin was assassinated (finally).
BieberLesbian

Bieber during his Lesbo phase.

Vigilant Christian Relationship

Justin Bieber has been the victim of a one-way relationship with Mario since October 6th, 2014. Mario has never came out and said it, Justin doesn't know of this relationship and is too busy chasing after Selena Gomez. On January 31, 2015, Mario called off the one-way relationship with Justin because he found out that he was having sexual intercourse with Selena Gomez and the Irish/British boyband One Direction.

Fans or "Beliebers"

Anne-frank-nyc

Bieber's biggest fan.

Fans of Justin Bieber include The Vigilant Christian, Osama Bin Laden, Satan, John Cena, Steven Anderson and TJ. TJ has Justin Bieber posters all over his wall in his bedroom and masturbates to his music before going to sleep.

The majority of "Beliebers" are spoiled teenage girls. Most of these girls are white and have an upper middle-class upbringing. The best way to deal with these people is to tell them exactly how shitty and vapid Bieber's substandard music really is.

Career

Justin Bieber is claimed to have made some kind of good music or some shit. It has yet to be found.

Trivia

  • Justin is kick ass at Dragon Quest.
  • Believed Anna Frank would be his fan.
  • He's got a penis.
  • Has a lot of creepy stalkers claiming to hate him.
  • The media cares more about Justin and every other big celebrity, than they do about actual problems in the world.
  • Drake Bell (famous for The Amanda Show, Drake & Josh and The Amazing Spider-Man) was mocking Justin when Justin was arrested and for a while before and after, ironically, on December 21, 2015, Drake Bell was arrested on suspicion of DUI, the same reason Justin was arrested.
  • He seems to get more hate than people who have actually caused major problems in the world.
  • Is believed to be homosexual, though no proof of these claims exist except for childish excuses like his voice and appearance before puberty.
  • Once said that "being gay is a choice and it doesn't affect him".
  • Believes "abortion is like killing a baby" (no shit).
  • Was asked a shit-tonne of creepy questions by Rolling Stone magazine at age 16.
  • Prefers Hunger Games over Harry Potter.
  • Was targeted by the Westboro Baptist Creeps back in July 2010.
  • Smells like piss.
  • Justin Bieber's favorite breakfast is a hearty helping of eggs and pancakes. TJ could hardly believe his banana filled asshole at this fact.
  • Justin speaks in complex metaphores, TJ had a hard time knowing what "Flight Delays=Not Sweet" meant. TJ thought it meant that no matter how much humanity progresses, we will always be apart from our true animal selves. What a dumbass, it was clearly predicting BananaGate 2011 being the second 9/11.
  • Once a week Justin gets to do his own thing like shooting hoops.
  • Justin Bieber doesn't fart. He releases fragrant blasts of lavender that smell delightful.
  • Is 22 and still has imaginary friends.
  • Is the target of many middle-aged men and their weird, creepy fucked up sex fantasies.
  • He believes Jezus is the reason he's here.
  • Doesn't believe in Evolution.
  • Believes that everything happens for a reason; even rape.
  • Is believed to be turning kids gay with his "effeminate looks".
  • Plays Pokémon GO.

TJ's Obsession (not as creepy as you think)

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