Fucking gay.

"*punch* Welcome to Earth."
—Will Smith inviting an illegal alien into our wonderful country.
Earth is a planet that consists of America and a few other places. It is ruled by a species of hairless monkeys that shit on everything. It is approximately 4.6 billion years old.


Earth was doing quite well for most of its history. Things started to go downhill when the aforementioned monkey-shitting creatures became the dominant species. Since they started burning lots of coal and oil, the flora and fauna of the planet have mysteriously begun to die. The most advanced monkey-shitting scientists recently realized that they themselves were the problem, and proceeded to complain lightly while the rest of the species made no changes whatsoever.

This planet is expected to become uninhabitable in the year known by the monkey-shitting creatures as "2080."

Relations With Other Species

Only one Earth species, the mammal known as "dog," is aware of the existence of extraterrestrial life. This species has made several attempts to hail space faring

Map Of The Only Country That Matters

The Four Regions of the United States

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