The Bible is the second book of the Religion fantasy book series. It's split in to two sections: the Old and New Testaments. Despite popular belief The Book Of Mormon is not the 3rd book of the Bible, but is in fact Bible Fan fiction. Creationist Cat is planning on authoring a third part of the Bible that will include parts omitted from the previous entrees that references the house cat that was zapped by God through the internet.
The Bible contains a bunch of violence, incest, sexism, talking animals and magic, so of course there have been editions made specifically for children. You could find better morality from the back of a cereal box than the pages of this tome, though, it does make very good cigarette paper. The Bible is often used to justify slavery and the murder of
innocent brown people dirty savages and poor gay people homosexual deviants. Modern Christians also like to justify terrible acts in the Bible by denying them, because they were in the old testament, saying it's ok because The Great Leader committed or condoned them, or it's Jesus foreshadowing.
The Bible Reloaded is a channel where 2 homosexual lovers named Jugo and Hake read the Bible.
The rip-off of the Bible is the Quran.
- TJ is the Father (God).
- Scotty is the Son (Jesus).
- Ben is the Holy Ghost.
- Brett Keane is Satan.
- Tumblr is Sodom and Gomorrah.
- Jim Ass is the talking Donkey in Genesis.
- The DP Wiki are the Hebrews.
- Mercedes Carrera is Esther.
- Paul's Ego is Moses.
Verses From Da Bizzy
- 1 "Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem." -Terminator Genisys 1:1
- "I be goin ta bust you what tha fuck mah Father has promised; but stay up in tha hood until you done been clothed wit juice from on high." -Luke 24:49
- "And afterward, I'ma pour up mah Spirit on all people. Yo crazy-ass lil playas n' daughtas will prophesy, yo' oldschool pimps will trip dreams, yo' lil' pimps will peep visions. 29 Even on mah servants, both pimps n' dem hoes, I'ma pour up mah Spirit up in dem days." -Joel 2:28-29
- "But as fo' me, I be filled wit power, wit tha Spirit of tha LORD, n' wit justice n' might, ta declare ta Jacob his cold-ass transgression, ta Israel his sin." -Micah 3:8
- "n' I have filled his ass wit tha Spirit of God, wit skill, mobilitizzle n' knowledge up in all kindz of crafts--" -Exodus 31:3
- "Teach me ta do yo' will, fo' yo ass is mah God; may yo' phat Spirit lead mah crazy ass on level ground." -Psalm 143:10
- "Dow shall not do drugs!" - Da Bible, somewhere in Leviticus or something