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Alex Jones

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"SUICIDE PILLS! MASS MURDER PILLS!"
—Alex Jones while masturbating and crying himself to sleep every night.
Bill Hicks is an Illuminati conspiracy theorist nut job and professional attention whore who happens to be the much maligned host of InfoWars. He goes by his fake name Alex Jones.

Beliefs

His basic explanation for all bad stuff in 'Murica is that an NWO secret society is taking our guns away and spying on us. They apparently poison the waters to make us (and frogs) gay and kill ourselves. He has casual outbursts of rage and psychotically filibusters any debate/argument he's in like an overgrown toddler that was told he can't have a candy bar at a grocery store. People say he needs to take his pills but you're gonna have a hard time getting him to do that.

InfoWars

Alex Jones Remix-Jones Circulation01:38

Alex Jones Remix-Jones Circulation

Alex Jones is also a host of the show InfoWars, a show so out there and bullshit it makes Fox look like a reputable news source. It is mainly focused on conspiracy theories, and has been featured occasionally on Drunken Peasants. Watching the show will make you question how crazy an indivijul can possibly be and how people can actually believe in the shit they're saying.

The show holds a lot of anti-vaccine views and has the view of the world being controlled under a large government. It has done completely factual, not unethical reporting about the Gay Bomb.

Bullshit Spreaders

Unfortunately, there are plenty of people who take what this psychopath says as fact and would rather believe him over facts. Thanks to him, there are now plenty of NWO conspiracy theorists like Mark Dice and the Vigilant Christian that spread this ignorant bullshit. Ironically, TVC thinks he is apart of the NWO.

Trivia

  • Alex Jones is actually Bill Hicks. Much like how Gordon Ramsey is Steve Irwin.
  • He has the super secret ability to go super saiyan.
  • He was famous for filming the Bohemian Grove burning a human effigy.
  • Al Jourgensen of Ministry was featured on his YouTube channel
  • Despite all the bad shit about him, he surprisingly doesn't believe in David Icke's reptilian people conspiracy.
  • He supports Donald Trump. From one crazy fuck to the next. His sucking of Trump's cock was featured in episode 216.
  • Despite all his rage, he is still just a rat in a cage.
  • Alex Jones does not yell in all of his videos. It should be noted that the ones where he doesn't are pretty boring.
  • Alex is always jonesing for more conspiracies.

Gallery

  • Alex Jones, Onision, and Venom Fang X all have something in common.
  • Jones' fans upon someone disagreeing with him.
  • Confirmed Jesuit.

External Links

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